| formerly known as aerolines :) |
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July 18th, 2008 @ 1:27am
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my journal is almost completely public.
very rarely do i make friend's only entries.
as for my friending policy... i don't really accept friends.
i like the size of my friend's list right now & the people on it.
& when i do want to add new friends, i like to go find them myself :).
that's just how i do, k. so, in conclusion: go away.
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| tonight, tonight. |
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November 5th, 2006 @ 6:08pm
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music |
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u2 ; sunday, bloody sunday |
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moved. ![[info]](http://l-stat.livejournal.com/img/userinfo.gif) bonjours.
add it please?
i'll be adding some of you myself too, so you can look out for it.
but if i didnt add you already, go ahead & add me, k :).
i want ALL of you over there <3.
oh, and btw. i did it. well... crap.
i don't feel like explaining this again.
( i'll just show you this msg i sent to reay. )
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| it's impossible to ignore you. |
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November 5th, 2006 @ 3:22pm
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mood |
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whateverrrr man |
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music |
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imogen heap ; goodnight & go |
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i have never so badly wanted to just get rid of a person, get them out of my life. today my dad & i were talking & he said, "any two people can get through any difficulty, if they just care enough". & the fact of the matter is that he doesn't care. the fact of the matter is that for the past two months i have been making a complete fool of myself for him, just throwing myself & my love at him at all hours of the day, for two months. just for him to be with someone else. i'm done. i'm completely through with him. i am cutting off all ties with him, until the day he decides he fully wants to be with me, is not with her or anyone else & calls me to tell me that. i don't even care how long it is anymore, because it doesn't matter. i'm done with this bullshit. i hate who i am right now, i hate loving him so much, i hate living for him, i hate everything i have & now i'm going to change it all because i'm just not happy. there can be no fucking medium, & he doesn't seem to get that. i love him. i can't be his friend, not even his best friend. i have to be his girlfriend too. & if that's not going to happen, then we can't happen, in any way, shape or form. i REFUSE to keep being his fucking little secret. that is not who i fucking am, HE LOVES ME. & if i love him & he loves me, why the fuck should i sit around & be his secret, while he spends every second with another girl he likes more? SOMEONE PLEASE TELL ME, HOW IS THAT LOVE? i don't care about any of this anymore. i am out of fuel. i am completely exhausted from this. & i am giving up now. i am not going to have any form of communication with him for as long as it takes, he will not be a part of my life.
by the way. i'm getting a new journal soon, i think.
i'm sorry guys, i know i do it WAY too fucking much.
but i need to. i really, really, really need to, for no reason
that i can really explain except that my mind is set on it.
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November 2nd, 2006 @ 5:34pm
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god, i love it when every fucking aspect of my life has gone to complete SHIT.
tons of fun, let me tell you. fuck, i want to die. i'm so sick & tired of this bullshit.
i've lost the love of my life to a completely mediocre girl, my friends won't stop
fucking fighting & making my days hell & my grades are all failing.
i feel like i could cry forever right now. i think i might try.
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November 1st, 2006 @ 9:27pm
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+ zach asked callie out on sunday. don't want to talk about it.
+ i'm assistant director of the christmas play at school.
+ i'm tired of this guy that likes me being EVERYWHERE. & it's really
hard to just ignore him 'cause he does so many sweet things for me :/.
+ i'm getting really close with god again. it's been a while. & i like it alot.
+ i'm doing so shitastic in school & i don't have a clue why.
+ i'm finally learning to drive. why does this process have to take so long?
i miss him. & i don't get it;
we still fall asleep on the phone every night.
he still voluntarily tells me he loves me all the time.
he needs to make up his mind.
it's like he has both of us.
& i don't fucking like that.
me & my babygirl, candace. i love this girl so much.
more than words can say. she's been there more than anyone lately.
ahhhhh, i'm just so grateful for her <3.
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